I guess that’s what we get when the hare tries to set a 10k trail using one piece of chalk.

At Paupers on Monday I was delighted to see Just Andrea, waitress from the Eton House, who kept her word and came out to play with us. Also present was Just Raja who had been hearing dreary tales about the hash from her roommate for a long, long time and finally decided to check it out for herself. There was also a sighting of big time backslider Phone Sex who was shopping on Spadina for a new pair of running jeans and decided to join us. We even had an appearance by hash celebrity Ultimate Asshole fresh off his successful US tour.

After carefully placing our bags in Rose Eh’s beautiful new Sunfire convertible, chalk talk got under way. At this point Flyer came trotting up in her bare feet leading senior citizen Shampoo to comment on how much she resembled Zola Budd. Of course only those over 50 got the reference. A gratuitous comment about “Skinny Minnie” Miller and Paul “The Bear” Rupert outed the rest of the seniors. After some forced laughter, hare Yakkety Yak gave detailed instructions for the benefit of the virgins. With introductions finished New Shoez led the pack down Lippincott and past Central Tech where legally blind GM Humpday missed some marks and messed everyone up.  Eventually the hare directed us to a trail which passed through Al Waxman Park and along Vanauley Walk. It was here where quick study Just Andrea found a novel way of marking trail. Using a trick reminiscent of Hansel and Gretel she tossed little piles of pre-digested food on Queen... on Spadina... in Grange Park... and at the U of T. No danger of that harriette getting lost.

Completing the exhausting trail I arrived at the James Joyce to find Rose Eh and Zephyr enjoying their reward. Also there was Yakkety Yak who thought his trail was so perfectly marked that he didn’t need to sweep. He was sooo wrong.

Eventually the rest of the gang began to arrive with Just Raja delighted that she had not only survived but finished before Eager Beaver, her jet setting roommate. We chugged a few pitchers at the Joyce then marched down the street to the Beer Station to hold circle. Here Humpday dished out the usual down downs before handing the circle to Rose Eh for Prick of the Week. Due to my short term memory loss I don’t recall the alleged infraction but I do remember it went to Mangina. It could possibly have been for his ability to breathe through his ears.

 A smidgen of good news did come out of this shitty trail. Yakkety Yak has agreed to have adult supervision on his next trail. The bad news is that “adult” is Humpday. Arrrgh!
With circle closed the half minds feasted on cheap beer, tardy food and an assortment of shooters. Ouch.