“With respect to the full moon and the cool weather I promise to set a hash trail and not a 10km training run.”  This enticement from Flyer encouraged 18 half minds to the Frog and Firken on Monday night. Unfortunately it was a typo. It should have read... “With respect to the full moon and the cool weather I promise to set a 10km training run and not a hash trail.” Oh, and while I’m at it. Three and you’re on... not! All falses are marked... not!

And now back to the story. I saw a couple new faces at the bar including Captain Hind Grinder from Ottawa, hashing in Toronto for the first time, and Just Tanya, an actual virgin and friend of Phone Sex.

After some pre hash lubrication the pack moved to the rear parking lot where Flyer explained her novel marks.  While Humpday sat down to get a closer look others speculated on the meanings of the stars, half moons and other assorted hieroglyphics.  After introductions the pack was on its way just as Zig Zag rolled up. Late as usual, he almost had to spend the night as his keys fell through a hole in his pocket not once but twice. I guess that’s what happens when you hash three days in a row in three different cities.

The lengthy trek led through York Cemetery and down into a dark and dank Burnett Park. By now all hope of a short hash trail had vanished with the silence broken only by Rose Eh’s whines of “Flyer! Are we on traaail!” and whimpers from Zephyr and Venta.

I think, for a change, Shadow had the right idea. Apparently afraid of the dark, he refused to go into the ravine. Of course none of this phased comrades Phone Sex and Just Tanya who kept marching along in their haute couture running gear

Eventually on hardened path, Wet ‘n Dirty accused Dung Dodger of hashing in cleats and muttered something about him finding his inner soccer mom.

Around about the Sheppard Bridge a worn out Humpday, feeling the need for a “pick me up”, stole a balloon from a kid. He says it made him run faster cuz he felt lighter. Yeah... right.

By now exhausted and disheartened the pack ran up Bathurst to Ellerslie before straggling back to the beer check at the Memphis Style Smokehouse. Yay.

Back at the Frog, the final tally showed that 4 half minds including COD, Shadow, Dung Dodger and Dead End had missed the beer check and 3 other clever folk just took off.

I was so exhausted that I don’t remember many down downs except to the hare for setting a shitty trail, Rose Eh for whining (ed. note WTF?), Captain Hind Grinder for hashing instead of visiting the ballet, Back Door Buzz for sartorial splendour and Dung Dodger for having a belt on trail.

I do recall however Rose Eh saying she heard Dung Dodger telling Just Rein about an Aussie novel he was reading. Just Rein replied that he doesn’t read books and is more of a haiku guy.
lips always moving
eternally babbling brook
 HaiPoo Guy is nigh