Walking through the parking lot of Georgy Porgy’s on Monday, I was almost a witness to a horrific accident. Some A-hole in a Porsche tried to run over our hare, Eager Beaver. Fortunately he swerved at the last moment and avoided putting an unsightly dent in his fender.

When we arrived, the bar was filled with the after school crowd. Fifteen minutes later we’d managed to scare them all away.

After instructions and introductions the trail led us through the parking lot of Victoria Terrace and north along VP before hopping a fence. I say “hopping” but that’s not exactly what Zephyr and Humpday did.

As FRB New Shoez ran along Railside, I ambled towards the park named in honour of Canadian naturalist Charles Sauriol. Here I met Sex Toy, Venta and Eager Beaver who were huddled together in front of the haunted Milne House, shivering in fear. I’m still trying to figure out if they were afraid of the ghosts... or Back Door Buzz. From here the trail wandered along the West Don River and up beside the awesome rail bridge.

It would have been a lovely trail... during the day.

That Eager Beaver has ummm... balls. The Beer Check was at a TTC stop on Railside. The only thing missing was a transit shelter. Of course if Birdbrain was there you’d probably want to keep a can of Glade handy.
Back at the bar, with Monday Night Football blaring on the big screens, Humpday started circle. Both Eager Beaver and New Shoez climbed under the table for their down downs; Eager Beaver for haring and New Shoez for FRB’ing.

Other down downs included a stressed out Rose Eh for making the stock market crash,
Hirsute Back Door Buzz for resembling Bigfoot and Sex Toy for having big feet,
Quick change artist Doo Hickey for being a chameleon,
Wet Spot for serious back sliding.
COD for trying to run over the hare and missing,
and Dead End for preparing for mother in law-hood.
Rose Eh declared Zephyr and Venta prick and tit of the week for giving their house in Motown away. As Zephyr said, “If it didn’t hurt so much it would be funny”.

After announcements the pack dug into some tasty pizza and burgers. Unfortunately, my liver was still screaming at me from Wet  ‘n Dirty’s strenuous Hogan’s, so it was an early night for your scribe.